Proverbs 17:20 He that hath a froward heart findeth no good: and he that hath a perverse tongue falleth into mischief.
If You Don’t Have Anything Nice to Say
There is a saying many have heard, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” That is definitely true. However, there is a similar problem, when people view life completely as a half empty cup. They only see the bad in everything. That is the reason they never have anything nice to say. As a result, all they can talk about is the bad things in life. A froward heart is ultimately the problem.
Froward – Perverse, that is, turning from, with aversion or reluctance; not willing to yield or comply with what is required; unyielding; ungovernable; refractory; disobedient; peevish; as a froward child. Webster’s 1828 Dictionary.
Being Flexible So You Can Help Others
A Christian needs to be flexible if they are going to be a blessing to others. When you are unwilling to comply with others in authority, all you will ever do is complain about the problems of life. Your tongue will become perverse, and sooner or later, you are going to get into all kinds of trouble. It all starts with a bad heart that is hard, stubborn, and unyielding to the things of God. We need to be pliable in the hands of God, so He can use us to help others. If you plan your day, such that any interruption throws you out of sorts, you are not very yielding. God may have something for you to do or someone to help, that may not fit into what you think needs to get done. If God’s kingdom is first, His business is always first, even if it crosses your plans.
Looking for the Good
It is important that we see the good in any situation. We should want to take even the slightest smoking flax and try to fan the flame to grow it for God. Do you look for that in others? Do you try to seek and to find the good, even in the worst Christians, or in yourself for that matter? If all you find is the problems in life, you are doing the bidding of the devil. He is the master at accusing the brethren of bad and ugly things. Do you use your tongue to try to build up others or do you use it tear down and destroy? If you are one who is always trying to find the bad and continue to tear down and destroy, that is not good. What you should do is try to find the good in any given situation and then build on that. Others might not grow as fast as you would like, but they are still growing. By the way, you are not their master, God is, and He might be just fine with the rate of growth.
The Best Can Be the Enemy of the Good
Try to find something good in every situation you are in. Look at life as a glass that is half full. It is called being an optimist. Vance Haver preached a message I have referred to before about the bad, the good, and the best. The bad is obviously the enemy of the good, that goes without saying. However, the best can be the enemy of the good as well. If we have too high of an expectation of others, they will never meet up to that expectation. We should be happy when the bad becomes good and the good becomes better. Growth is what our Lord wants. We are dealing in a world of reality, we are not in heaven yet. Look for the good and get rid of your froward heart. Use your tongue to build others up. Tell yourself to ignore the flesh and the devil when they try to get you to cut others down.